Stop. Where are you now?
Stop. Where are you now?
During a Facilitative Leadership course, whenever any of us students suddenly appeared lost while practicing our new skills for leading productive conversations and building consensus, our coach would say these very helpful words. Immediately we were centered. We then could explore our actions, our purpose and our goals, and jump back in to the situation with a new and more productive approach.
I’ve found these words to be incredibly useful in conflict and potential conflict situations.
I quietly say these words to myself. When I find myself in a conversation which could become a conflict; when mediating, counseling or coaching parties in conflict, I can use these words to find my center. Examine with care my actions, purpose and goals, and jump back in … in control of myself and able to guide the situation productively.
Whether I find myself getting heated or need to ensure that I remain empathic and patient in the face of another’s building tension, this twist on the old ‘counting to ten.’
Try it yourself and see how many times you can turn a potential conflict into an opportunity to strengthen your relationship … and yourself.
